


why on earth should that it mean it is not real?

by notquiteaghost



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Challenge on Infinite Earths, Established Relationship, Genderqueer Character, Hogwarts AU, Jehan and Moaning Myrtle are BFFs, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-06
Updated: 2013-06-06
Packaged: 2017-12-14 03:27:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/832172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notquiteaghost/pseuds/notquiteaghost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Grantaire is going to be late for Herbology. And he's panicking. </p><p>Not because he's going to be late - Professor Longbottom's cool, he won't mind - but because of why he's late. Because he can't find Jehan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> title is, of course, from dumbledore; "of course it is happening inside your head, harry, but why on earth should that mean it is not real?" (hi i read books and re-appropriate quotes for trans* narratives it's a thing).
> 
> there may or may not be more to this. there isn't really an overarching plot (apart from, perhaps, enjolras' attempts to abolish the house system), but it's fun. i like writing plotless, slice-of-life type things, it's good stress relief.
> 
> TW: mentions of off-screen trans*phobia, homophobia, misgendering and slurs.

Grantaire is going to be late for Herbology. And he's panicking. 

Not because he's going to be late - Professor Longbottom's cool, he won't mind - but because of why he's late. Because he can't find Jehan. 

Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws have Herbology together. So, it's become habit for Grantaire and Jehan to meet up at breakfast and walk down to the greenhouses together. Except Jehan wasn't at breakfast. And, according to Combeferre, ze hasn't been seen since yesterday evening. 

Combeferre wasn't too worried, but Combeferre doesn't know Jehan like Grantaire does. Grantaire assumes the worst, and with Jehan, the worst is damn scary. So, yeah, Grantaire's panicking. 

He's already checked the Ravenclaw common room, the kitchens, the library and that classroom on the second floor that's perpetually empty. He's now systematically going through all of the bathrooms, and if he doesn't have any luck there, he's trying the Room of Requirement, then he's moving onto the grounds. 

Jehan is in the fourth bathroom he checks, the first floor girl's bathroom. Ze's sat on the floor, playing what looks disturbingly like a game of cards with Myrtle. 

They both look up and blink in surprise when Grantaire bursts in. "There you are!" He says, and Jehan frowns. 

"Were you looking for me?"

"You're only allowed to stay if you're nice to zir." Myrtle adds, with a pointed look. 

Grantaire says, with a pointed look of his own, "When am I ever not nice to zir?"

Myrtle concedes the point with a huff, and Grantaire turns his attentions to Jehan. 

"You didn't forget about Herbology, did you?" He asks, mirroring Jehan's frown. "And did you sleep in here? Have you eaten yet?"

"I made zir have breakfast." Myrtle reassures him, and he smiles at her gratefully. Grantaire doesn't really understand why she's got such a bad reputation; she's always been quite reasonable, if you ask him, but maybe that's Jehan's calming influence. 

"I didn't forget about Herbology." Jehan says, sounding not quite petulant, but not quite anything else, either. "I just... didn't want to go."

"So you decided to hide out in the bathrooms without telling anyone where you were?"

Jehan flushes, staring at the floor. "I didn't think. I mean, I didn't think I needed to."

"You honestly didn't expect me to worry?" Grantaire asks, sitting down beside zir and raising an eyebrow. "And, what, if I'd pulled a disappearing act like this, you wouldn't have been just a teensy bit panicked?"

"I didn't think." Jehan repeats, still staring at the floor. 

"Ze was crying." Myrtle puts in, helpfully. Jehan's head whips up and ze glares at her, but Myrtle just looks at zir, unrepentant. "What? You were. There's no shame in it, crying's good for you. Better than keeping it all bottled up." She pauses, turning to Grantaire and adding, in a lower voice, "It was those Gryffindor boys again, the seventh years."

"Harris and Jones?" Grantaire says, surprised. "Didn't Enjolras make _them_ cry the last time they pulled something like this?"

"Said it was my fault." Jehan says, quietly. "Said I was a tattle-tale as well as a dirty, good for nothing queer. Said I was just doing it for attention. Said I deserved what was coming to me. Kept calling me a boy."

Grantaire places a hand on his jaw, both for comfort and to meet Jehan's eyes. "And they're wrong," he says, voice firm. "You know yourself best, and if you say you're not a boy, then you're not a boy. And they couldn't tell their arses from their faces, so it's not like they're good for anything."

Jehan smiles at that. It's a small, teary smile, but it's still a smile. Grantaire counts it as a win. "Thank you."

"Just doing my job." Grantaire says. "It's in my contract, right? Worrying over you, invading your privacy, making you smile?"

"You're the best boyfriend ever." Jehan assures him, and Grantaire grins and leans in for a kiss. 

He distantly hears Myrtle say, "I'll just be off, then..." and disappear down a sink, but he's more focused on Jehan's mouth. Much more focused. 

Some time later, they break apart, and Grantaire presses a line of kisses across Jehan's jaw whilst ze catches zir breath. 

"There's still thirty minutes of Herbology left." Ze says, still slightly breathless. 

Grantaire pulls back to say, "We don't have to go. I'm sure Professor Longbottom will understand, if we find him and explain later. What have you got next?"

"Ancient Runes."

"With Combeferre and Feuilly, right?"

Jehan nods.

"And, on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you want to go?"

"...Seven." Jehan says. "A very solid seven. Seven's a good number."

"Then, in half an hour, I'll walk you to Ancient Runes." Grantaire says. "And, because I love you so much, I'll spend my free period Charming you one of those pronouns badges, alright?"

"I love you too." Jehan says, by way of reply. Grantaire smiles and kisses zir again, because he can.


	2. Chapter 2

Grantaire first meets Jehan Prouvaire in the Great Hall on the third day of his first year.

Jehan and Enjolras are table-hopping, because Enjolras has been here for three days and he's already trying to abolish the house system.

Jehan sits down beside Grantaire on the Hufflepuff table, smiling wide and saying, "Hi. I'm Jehan."

"Grantaire." Grantaire says, not quite sure what to make of this boy, with the flowers woven through his hair and the embroidery on his robes and his really, really pretty eyes. 

"How are you liking Hogwarts, Grantaire?" Jehan asks, with a smile, and Grantaire shrugs.

"It's, um, it's okay." He says. And, at Jehan's encouraging smile, adds, "I really like Charms. And Joly, my dorm mate, he's really cool."

Grantaire doesn't know it yet, but this is the start of a beautiful friendship.

\---

It's during their third year that Jehan, after a minor mental breakdown that absolutely terrified Grantaire, pulls Grantaire into an empty classroom one lunch and says, "So, I don't think I'm a boy."

Grantaire, without missing a beat, says, "Okay. Do you know what you are instead?"

Jehan looks surprised, like he'd been expecting Grantaire to be confused or disgusted or angry, but that's just Jehan's insecurities talking. There's absolutely no reason to Grantaire to do anything but accept, adjust, and move on.

"I, um. I don't think I'm anything?" Jehan says, biting at his lip. "I did research, and there are words. Agender, that feels right."

"Okay. How do you want me to talk about you?" Grantaire asks, "What words should I use?"

"Ze and zir, instead of he and his. And, just, don't call me a boy. Please."

Grantaire nods, makes a mental note to do some in-depth research of his own, and says, "So, have you finished that Defence Against the Dark Arts essay yet? Because I haven't." And, just like that, they move on. 

And it's at the very beginning of their fifth year that Grantaire realises he has a crush the size of a small planet on Jehan.

This realisation is quickly followed by a small-scale identity crisis. Because, okay, he's known he isn't exactly straight and narrow for a while now, but still. Jehan is... well, Jehan is Jehan. Ze is, first and foremost, a poet and a Romantic and incredibly good at Transfiguration. And that's what Grantaire is in love with, not zir gender or zir appearance or anything. (Though he can't deny that Jehan is pretty damn nice to look at).

Grantaire emerges from this small-scale identity crisis with the knowledge that he's attracted more to personality, gender identity doesn't really factor into it, and by 'crush' he actually means 'head over heels in love with'.

From there, his first point of call is Courfeyrac, who he finds dozing on the grass by the lake.

"I need to ask you something." he says, sitting down beside him.

Courfeyrac blinks his eyes open slowly and says, "Me? What?"

"What do you think the best way to woo Jehan is?"

Courfeyrac just stares at him for several long moments, his face cycling through several expressions as he does so. First is surprise, then realisation, then bemusement, then excitement. "Glad you finally worked out you like zir. And, well, it's Jehan, isn't it? Poetry, flowers, something like that? Or, well, you could just pull zir into an empty classroom, tell zir you really like zir, and ask if you could kiss zir. That would probably be easiest."

"You're no fun." Grantaire grumbles, but he has to admit that Courfeyrac has a point. Grand gestures never really work out how they're meant to.

Courfeyrac rolls his eyes, and says, "Go find your future life partner and kiss zir, already. You're just wasting time now."

Grantaire sticks out his tongue, then heads off towards the Ravenclaw Tower.

\---

It's near the end of November when Grantaire gets a letter at breakfast.

The letter is dropped into his lap by Persephone, his sister's owl, and narrowly misses hitting Jehan, who is also in Grantaire's lap. (By fifth year, they have succeeded in revolutionising the table arrangements. Near everyone table-hops now. Grantaire is pretty sure there are some first years who don't even know the original table designations).

Jehan sits up as Grantaire unfurls the parchment, and they read it together.

 _R_ , it reads, _I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I'm afraid to report that, according to Mother, it would be best if you not come home at Christmas this year. Father has, apparently, only gotten worse since summer. You are welcome to stay with me instead, and bring that delightful poet of yours too, or stay at school. Your call. Best of luck, Lynette_

"Oh." Jehan says, quietly.

Grantaire rolls the letter up and tucks it into his pocket. "It's not like it's a surprise."

"He let you come home last year." Jehan points out. "You went home at summer."

"Yeah, and I hated it." Grantaire counters. "Father thinks I'm a failure, a disgusting queer, and good for exactly nothing. He's--"

"Wrong." Jehan interjects, voice fierce and firm. "He's wrong. He is so very wrong, R."

"I know." Grantaire says. He pulls Jehan closer, as close as possible. "But he's been telling me that for years, now, so I think it's understandable that he doesn't want me in the house. And he hasn't outright forbidden it, anyway. He wouldn't do _that_ ; that would be _mean_. No, this is Mother, trying to prevent confrontation and arguments, because that's what she does."

"Do you want to go to your sister's?"

Grantaire thinks the idea over for a moment - his sister's flat, a small and cosy place full of books, where no one would shout at him or make him do anything he didn't want to and he could go out to lunch and have fish and chips for Christmas dinner - but shakes his head. "I'd rather stay here. I'd hate to be a burden. And, besides, I want to be with you."

Jehan smiles at that, a small quirk of zir lips that ze ducks zir head to hide, but Grantaire sees and presses a kiss into zir hair accordingly.

He's looking forward to Christmas already.

**Author's Note:**

> i am [here](http://idoubtthereforeimightbe.tumblr.com) on tumblr.


End file.
